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Reviews Counted:76
Fresh:42
Rotten:34
Average Rating:5.7/10
Consensus: This gory, senses-assaulting slasher film is an unpretentious, effective mix of old-school horror stylings and modern 3D technology.
Theatrical Release:16-01-2009
Synopsis: Bloodthirsty fans of the classic slashers of yesteryear should be sated by MY BLOODY VALENTINE (2009), a gory trip that’s not just a remake but a retro-amalgam of the greatest hits from the 1970s,... [More]
Starring: Jensen Ackles, Jaime King, Kerr Smith, Betsey Rue
Director: Patrick Lussier
The trouble is that after that first gouged eyeball, there's not a whole lot further to go. Novelty value being a rapidly diminishing thing, the technology demands an escalation in intensity and inventiveness that the movie doesn't deliver.
The plot staggers from absurd to ridiculous, and the dialogue is strictly of the 'Look we don't have to go down there' variety.
A strange synergy of old and new, My Bloody Valentine 3D blends cutting-edge technology and old-school prosthetics to produce something both familiar and alien: gore you can believe in.
Top CriticIn some ways, the filmmakers have created something too authentic in spirit to the original film, as it also fairly quickly becomes a plodding chore to watch.
Top CriticApart from hewing to old-school slasher rules as if they were the Talmud, the braintrusts behind My Bloody Valentine 3-D seem to have concentrated on coming up with things to shake at the audience, from the bloody to the benign, a la SCTV's Dr. Tongue.
My Bloody Valentine may not be horribly acted, but in a post-Scream and post-Scary Movie era, it's difficult to squeeze any more blood from this low-brow/high-camp turnip.
The film is strictly by-the-numbers slasher boilerplate. It won't endure past the weekend.
Despite a few creative scares, this 3D enhanced horror film never quite delivers on its central gimmick.
Right now with ticket prices sky rocketing, why not see a flick that will keep you cringing and practically feels like an amusement park ride.
[C]heat[s] at the end. In such a huge way that it's the most stunningly bad thing about the movie. And it's not like there's not a lot of competition for the bad here.
makes great use of the 3-D format in a better than average horror film.
This lowest-common-denominator remake of/sequel to a minor slasher classic succeeds on purely technical terms but, despite the depth effects, it's a serious snooze.
My Bloody Valentine is a fun throwback to the golden era of slasher movies--packed with gore, nudity, and the classic gimmick of 3D.
Sure, the 3-D thing is a gimmick, right along with the gratuitous violence and nudity, but the real surprise is that it's not a bad horror film, either.
Made for the genre's fans, this exploitation item delivers the basic goods by applying modernist technology and f/x to a formulaic slasher of the 1980s.
Body parts are lopped off. Pick axes are stabbed at the camera. There's even a completely naked girl chased by the killer, in glorious 3D. This movie spoke to me.
Parental Content Review
If you're expecting lots and lots of extreme gore you won't be disappointed.
The end credits scroll over a single long tracking shot that goes progressively deeper into a coal mine, and the fact that it's creepier and more atmospheric than anything preceding it is a sad statement.
Director and co-editor Lussier (a frequent Wes Craven collaborator) plays the 3-D gimmick for all its worth.
Top Critic
September 08, 2009:
Patrick Lussier in Talks for Halloween 3-D 
Having decided not to partner up with Rob Zombie for the next "Halloween" sequel, Dimension has entered into talks with Patrick Lussier ("My Bloody Valentine 3D"). More...
May 09, 2009:
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Henry Selick, the animation mastermind behind such Certified Fresh classics as The Nightmare Before Christmas and James and the Giant Peach adds another gong to his cabinet with... More...
January 19, 2009:
Box Office Guru Wrapup: Paul Blart Segways Ahead of the Competition
This weekend the North American box office was on fire once again as four new releases all scored muscular debuts helping to drive the marketplace to the biggest January weekend... More...
January 16, 2009:
UK Critics Consensus: The Wrestler Pile-drives The Critics, But Don’t Waste any £s on Seven Pounds
With critical success for Slumdog Millionaire last week (94%), we have more award-friendly fare in the UK cinemas this Friday in Darren Aronofsky's spandex-tastic The Wrestler.... More...
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