You realize how hard this is on me, to have to tell you what a superb job director Marcus Nispel has done re-creating, yet also revising, 1974's grisly, gristly, protein-centric masterpiece.
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003)
Tomatometer
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Reviews Counted:151
Fresh:54
Rotten:97
Average Rating:4.8/10
Consensus: An unnecessary remake that's more gory and less scary than the original.
Runtime: 1 hr 38 mins
Genre: Horror/Suspense
Synopsis: On August 20th, 1973, police were dispatched to the remote farmhouse of Thomas Hewitt, the former head-skinner at a local slaughterhouse in Travis County, Texas. What they found within the confines... On August 20th, 1973, police were dispatched to the remote farmhouse of Thomas Hewitt, the former head-skinner at a local slaughterhouse in Travis County, Texas. What they found within the confines of the cryptic residence was the butchered remains of 33 human victims, a chilling discovery that shocked and horrified a nation in what many still refer to as the most notorious mass murder case of all time. Wearing the grotesque flesh masks of his victims and brandishing a chainsaw, the killer, known as “Leatherface,” would gain infamy when sensational headlines were splashed across newspapers throughout the state of Texas: “House of Terror Stuns Nation – Massacre in Texas.” Local authorities would eventually gun down a man wearing a leathery mask and declare they had their killer, which abruptly closed the case; however, in the years that followed, many close to the grisly murder case would come forward to level accusations that police had botched the investigation and knowingly killed the wrong man. Now, for the first time, the only known survivor of the killing spree has broken the silence and come forward to tell the real story of what happened on a deserted rural Texas highway when a group of five young kids inadvertently found themselves besieged by a chainsaw-wielding madman, one who would leave a trail of blood and terror that would forever become known as “The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.” New Line Cinema presents The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, a terrifying journey into a heart of unimaginable darkness as five young adults are stranded in a rural Texas town, only to find themselves fighting for their lives against Leatherface and his bizarre clan. Inspired by the 1974 classic film of the same name, the new film stars Jessica Biel, Jonathan Tucker, Erica Leerhsen, Mike Vogel and Eric Balfour. Co-starring are screen veteran R. Lee Ermey, Lauren German, David Dorfman, Andrew Bryniarski, Terrence Evans, Heather Kafka and Marietta Marich. Marcus Nispel, the mastermind behind many of the most powerful images and story-telling themes in contemporary music videos and commercials, makes his feature film directorial debut. New Line Cinema presents in association with Michael Bay and Radar Pictures a Platinum Dunes/Next Entertainment Production. The film is produced by Michael Bay and Mike Fleiss. The executive producers are Ted Field, Jeffrey Allard, Guy Stodel, Andrew Form and Brad Fuller. The screenplay is by Scott Kosar (based on a screenplay by Kim Henkel and Tobe Hooper). The creative behind-the-scenes team is led by cinematographer Daniel Pearl (who also served as director of photography on the original 1974 release), production designer Greg Blair, costume designer Bobbie Mannix, special effects make up artist Scott Stoddard, special effects coordinator Rocky Gehr, editor Glen Scantlebury and composer Steve Jablonsky. New Line Cinema will release The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (rated “R” by the M.P.A.A. for “strong horror violence/gore, language and drug content”) in theaters nationwide on October 17th, 2003. [More]
Starring: Jessica Biel, Jonathan Tucker, Eric Balfour, Erica Leerhsen
Starring: Jessica Biel, Jonathan Tucker, Eric Balfour, Erica Leerhsen, Mike Vogel, Lauren German, R. Lee Ermey
Director: Marcus Nispel
Director: Marcus Nispel
Screenwriter: Scott Kosar
Producer: Michael Bay, Mike Fleiss, Andrew Form
Studio: New Line Cinema
Reviews for The Texas Chainsaw Massacre
So utterly unimaginative it doesn't even count as hommage; it's just a smudgy copy of a still chilling original.
Next to this redundant, pointless and witless retread, the classic status of Tobe Hooper's original version is officially beyond dispute.
Really nothing more than clever, exploitative marketing. But, taken alone, it's a reasonably satisfying diversion.
Mainly it's a vapid, vicious thrill ride that washes away immediately.
Unlike movies such as Seven, there isn't enough style in the new The Texas Chainsaw Massacre to justify the bloodbath, and it's riddled with too much been-there-done-that to endure as a classic.
Highlight: Biel in a meat locker. A very chilly meat locker. Lowlight: pretty much everything else.
Merely (and mildly) reshuffling the oft-imitated elements of Tobe Hooper's teens-vs.- hillbillies psychodrama.
The new Massacre lowers the bar much the way the original 'dead teenager' horror flick did way back in 1974, and makes a mockery of that industry self-policing rubber stamp known as the ratings board.
For those who've seen the original, no surprises will be unearthed other than an altered story (not for the better) and more gore.
Does convey the sense of being caught in a nightmare. A stupid person's nightmare.
A splatterfest remake that relentlessly assaults the senses and mind with no discernable redeeming social value.
Just as humorless as the original, but it's also slicker, glossier and resoundingly artificial.
While the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre was genuinely creepy, this one is simply explicit.
A scary and nauseating film, which is precisely what it set out to be and that's what makes it such a cut above the rest.
Offers full, living meaning to the word 'gratuitous' as it applies to film violence and is an exercise in being grossed out.
Gruesome enough; what it lacks is a distinctive revolting personality of its own.
It is nearly as tense and nasty as the original and, to be fair, features far better acting, most notably by Jessica Biel, who is compelling even when she isn't about to burst out of her wet T-shirt.
A lame re-do of the 1974 cult classic that lacks not only the gritty and grim 'charm' of the first film, but also features little in the way of shocks, thrills or chills.
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